Kristy Cammell How do you homeschool high school, and do it well? It’s a question that’s probably sitting in the back of your mind, and it’s a question that often comes up as your kids grow. Have you noticed it too? All those well-meaning questions from those around you as your children near high school age? Or even when it’s a distant dot on the horizon?
It caught me by surprise, I admit. Not because my intentions had changed, but because of the pressure I put on myself to have an answer. To have the “right” answer. And I realised that I’d done it again… I’d started falling into the trap of a traditional school mindset!
So how do you combat this thinking when you look toward the high school years?
Friend, I’m glad you asked.
It’s all a matter of perspective. Just like it was back when you started.
I know, I know. It feels like the stakes are way higher right now. Because the pressure is on to produce a functioning member of society by the time you’re done homeschooling.
But the reality is, it’s no different.
You still take it one day at a time, and do the best you can with what you know. Sound familiar?!
Yes, you want to ensure that you’re setting your child(ren) up for success.
Yes, you want to keep their options open where you can.
But how do you do that, and what does it really mean?
I believe, first and foremost, that it means that you want your child to become an adult who:
thinks for themselves,
includes others,
communicates effectively,
has a thirst for learning,
understands what it means to work hard,
shows empathy,
and finds joy in what they do.
Each of those things are learned by living them out. Which is what homeschooling is all about.
Finding a job or a career is a side note of these. Think about it. It’s common these days to change careers across the course of your lives. And we have so many resources at our fingertips to make learning a way of life, which is fantastic!
Your role, then, is to help them learn how to learn as well as where they can learn. To have ignited within them an unquenchable thirst for learning that will stay with them for life.
So, how do you successfully homeschool high school, and do it well?
Here are seven ways:
1. Pursue their passions.
At the very beginning of the high school years, I sit each child down and ask them: what is it that you’d like to pursue more of this year? What passion would you like to invest more time into? And I tailor their year around making time and space for these. I continue to ask this question and tailor what we do based on their responses.
You can do the same! Help your young person to discover what they are passionate about. Give them opportunities to try new things, build hobbies and develop interests that are unique to them. Make this a goal of their homeschool high school years. Tap into what makes them tick, and how they are uniquely wired to enjoy some things more than others.
I tell you, it is SO exciting to see their desire to learn, practise and grow in those areas ignite their self-motivation as well as a healthy confidence in their own skills and abilities. Remember: you kids are watching you. They learn what you model: so remember to invest in your own passions, too, to show that it is important to pursue your passions no matter your age.
2. Relationship first.
Always remember this. I personally don’t subscribe to the generalisations that are made about teenagers, but that’s a topic for another day! Regardless, whatever is going on… remember that your relationship with your young person is a key aspect of your homeschooling. As you homeschool high school, you are growing, equipping, trusting, supporting and enabling them to discover their uniqueness.
I’d even go as far as to say this: if keeping your child home feels like it is damaging your relationship with them, and you find yourself seriously considering school? Then weigh it up carefully and discuss why. Whether the conversation propels them to make a change, or school does end up being the right thing for a season, you haven’t failed. Every minute of every day of every week you’ve homeschooled, still counts as a success. In the bigger picture, you’re simply tailoring the best path for each child, even if that doesn’t look like you expected.
3. Involve your young person.
Get your young person involved in the decision making process, but also recognise when you need to step in and make the call on their behalf. This goes for curriculum choices, extra-curricular activities, commitments, volunteer opportunities, courses… you name it. Our young people need our trust, our mentoring and our guidance. It’s such a gift to walk this journey with them, and help them become all that they are called to be!
4. Remember: it’s about character.
It’s not all about the academics. That’s just a part of the bigger picture. You’re growing a responsible, thoughtful, kind, assertive human and you want that to be the priority. Those frustrating moments, those times you both lost your cool… they’re all learning opportunities. Call it character development. For both of you. It’s about making mistakes. And picking yourself up again. Practising resilience, persistence and stick-to-it ness. That’s all part of what happens as you homeschool high school, and it matters, too.
Don’t forget to find joy in the process (yes, even on the hard days) and remember what an amazing thing you’re doing here. If that means taking a breather from what you’d planned, and throwing in a bit of spontaneity… then do it! You won’t ever regret that in the bigger picture. Put it this way: when they’re an adult, what do you want them to remember about their homeschool high school years? Let that be a defining factor in what you do.
5. And: it’s about learning how to learn.
Every book, podcast, activity, tutorial and curriculum choice is about more than the knowledge your young person is gaining along the way. Look for resources that equip them to learn in different ways, at the same time as helping them to understand more about how they learn best. Support them in trying new methods and techniques. Learning how to learn is an essential skill in this age of information being so freely available from so many sources.
Talk about why they’re drawn to particular types of resources, and encourage them to expand their repertoire by exploring other methods, too. You never know: something they haven’t tried yet might turn out to be what gels most with them! And if it doesn’t, that’s okay too. To homeschool high school is to provide opportunities that will equip and grow your young person along the way.
6. Look for that sweet spot.
Be aware of what you’re aiming for as you homeschool high school, and what is possible. Do your research. Don’t leave it too late to ensure that your young person has the learning they need under their belt, in order to achieve their goals. Whether university entry, high school qualifications, or to be eligible for an entry course at a local polytechnic. Or that they’re equipped with the motivation, skills and entrepreneurship they need to start a business, step into an apprenticeship or take a job where their passions lead.
If you feel like they’re too young to know yet, consider what you need to do in order to keep their options open. Look for that sweet spot of growing and extending them without having schoolwork take over their life (unless they’re academically driven and that’s what they love!)
Think outside the box. Life doesn’t have to change because your child turned 13 or started Year 9 or reached Junior High age. But having some idea of the possibilities and options ahead of you will help you feel better equipped to guide your young person along their own unique homeschool high school path, one small step at a time.
7. Stop second-guessing yourself!
You have the responsibility – but also the luxury – of designing a path that suits your young person. This may chop and change as you work with them, but that’s all part of the journey. Don’t be swayed by FOMO (Fear Of Missing Out) or my personal version: FOLD (Fear Of Letting them Down.). Don’t give in to the FOLD, instead forge your own way, together.
Stay in your lane and focus on your young person rather than getting swamped by all the if, buts and maybes. Don’t second guess your decisions… I’ll bet you’re doing waaay better at all this than you give yourself credit for, already!
Finally…
Next time you find well-meaning questions directed your way about how you will homeschool high school, don’t give in to the overwhelm. Don’t give in to the assumption that everything changes when you have a teenager in the house. Instead, remember that just like every other step of the journey so far, you’ll keep taking it one small step at a time.
I’ve seen so many young people graduate from homeschooling over the years. I’ve been immensely encouraged to see the sheer variety of paths each one has taken, and the way that each of them are thriving adults today. While none of mine have quite reached that milestone yet, my eldest is getting surprising close. And it’s a wonderful thing to walk this stretch of the path together.
So you know what? I’ll bet that one day, you and I will look back in amazement at the route our young person took as they grew, and the fond memories we built together along the way. Because in the end, what more could we ask?
Further reading to help you
When your teen doesn’t have a plan from simplehomeschool.net
Highschool Qualification Options for NZ Home Educators by Cynthia Hancox
Lime Feather Learning (Online GED & SAT prep course) by Shirley Erwee
Homeschool & Beyond by The Home School Mom
Teen Specific by NCHENZ (National Council of Home Educators NZ)
Homeschooling: what you really need to know
THE COURSE – coming soon! Join me for five self paced sessions over coffee as we chat about all things homeschooling, including tips for juggling all the ages, supporting your young people and curriculum ideas to consider. I’d love to see you inside!
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